”what are you even doing with your life?
aren’t you supposed to be out there enjoying it?”

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I haven’t seen you in 6 years

Crowded hall, cheap powder room dramas, secret but not really secret smoking areas, students cutting classes, classmates getting bullied, teachers abusing pupils, passing  and failing classes we won’t need in real life, and every crap you’d hear from everybody’s mouth.
High School.
Some hates it.
Some loves it.
Some finds friends.
Some finds nemesis.
I, myself, hated it but I found friends.

I was a loser.
I had no money for every shit I needed for school.
I was fat – a reason to be one of the popular stories by popular kids.
The reason I got bullied.
But I had my friends.
They were the best.
They made school a little less hell.
We’re not cool, neither smart.
But we had fun.
I was convinced that they were the reasons
I got through high school.
I was ugly crying on our graduation ceremony.
I was sure I won’t make it to college without them.
I was scared of losing them.
I was a coward.

But I went to college anyway.
I met new people and got busy with school.
My high school friends and I had very little communication on those years.
I changed and they changed, too.
We were busy with our own lives.
I graduated from college.
And the other one did, too.
One got pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful baby.
And other one moved to a different city
to live with her boyfriend.

It’s funny that we actually had plan to go to the same university,
live in one house and be friends forever.
But we’re different now as grown ups.
Whenever I talk to them,
the conversation would only be catch up stories.
(“kumusta?”
Me working.
The other one is, too.
One’s making her own family.
And the other one is still living with her boyfriend and continue her studies.
We’re all doing fine.)
No more giggling stories about boys.
No more bitch hating stories.
No more future plans.
Not that I don’t like what we talk about now.
It’s just I miss the crazy minds we all had back then..

We’ve grown apart.
We’re adults now.
Of course, it’s not the same.
And I know that nobody has to stay the same.
But I wish it’s not like this.

I don’t want to wake up one day that these friends would only be just familiar faces.
I don’t want to be someone’s ‘I used to know someone’s story.

Sleepless Night Thoughts 3

Okay. After my long week obsession of the TV show, Stranger Things (which is by the way, an awesome show. I watched it 4 times now and if I saw someone watching it, I’d probably sit with them and watch the whole season 1 once again) I’m back at planning what tv shows or movies I should watch next (#nosociallife #foreveralone). I couldn’t sleep because I have some films I’ve been dying to see (yep, losr). First up, Suicide Squad. Its trailer and music and actors are the reasons why I’m excited to see this film. Although, I’ve read some reviews that it’s not that good, I still want to see it on big screen, just not this week. People I’m coming with are not yet available (oh eto na naman ako sa gantong sitwasyon di ba?) but we will watch it. Next Movie. Swiss Army Man. The trailer really fucks me up (go ahead and watch it, you’d know why). So weird that I had dreamed about it (not good. I died). I am very curious about the story and why the fuck Paul Dano and Daniel Radcliffe agreed to star on this. I bet it’s a good film though. But I can’t find a site where I could watch it. Third one. Train To Busan. Aha that Korean zombie film. Man, the trailer looks so good. I think it’s the first Asian film about zombie. I’m hoping this will be shown here in PH. Fourth film. The Childhood of a Leader. First 10 seconds watching the trailer, I knew I wanted to see this one. The musical score sounds perfect to the setting of the movie. The cinematography (based on the trailer) looks very good. Actually the fact that this film was nominated and brought 5 winning awards is enough for me to watch it. Unfortunately, the streaming videos available online don’t have english subtitles yet. I guess, I have to wait. And the last film is I Am Not A Serial Killer. I think it’s an indie film and it has a lot of potential. But just like the others, I haven’t watched this one. It cannot be found anywhere on the internet yet.

So yeah, that’s my list. If you know sites where I could watch these, please let me know. This is me. movie junkie, a couch potato. I love TV series and films. What are the films you’re excited to see? Maybe I could watch them too.. That’s it for now. I’m getting sleepy. G’Night.